"To continue on the path I would have to make a jump and if I slipped it would be my last jump on this earth."

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Despair

 The path that I was on was easy to follow and the route was very scenic. At times, there was a high rocky cliff to my right and to my left there was a stunning drop off into what I assume was Guatemala. After walking for what seemed like hours (but was probably a much shorter time in reality), I finally came upon what I assumed was the house that the man had told me about. It really wasn’t much of a house; it was a wooden frame with straw on top and there didn’t appear to be anyone at home. By my estimation it was about 2 or 3 in the afternoon so I thought that maybe they were working nearby. I yelled at the top of my lungs a few times hoping that someone would hear me but no one answered back or came so I began looking for the path that I was supposed to follow. The problem was, there were a few different paths leading away from the house. I just started going down different paths to see where they led.  After five minutes on the first path that

I tried, I lost my way so I quickly climbed back up the hill to the house. By this time, I only had a few drops of cow water left and of course I had not eaten at all that day. I decided that it would be better to wait at the house for a while. If I had to spend the night somewhere, I thought, I should be in a place where I might run into people later on. So, I curled up under the house and son I fell asleep. I am not sure but I think I was asleep for two hours and as I slept I dreamt that different people came and gave me directions to get back to Trigales. It was a nice dream but reality set in again when I awoke. I was still alone on the side of a volcano and now it was beginning to rain a little bit. I was starting to panic and I really had no idea what to do. As I began to look around the house a little bit, I noticed something rather strange. There were cardboard boxes flattened on the ground (like a bed maybe?) and a lot of junk food litter. There were also tuna cans and soda bottles lying in different spots. There was some graphite on a nearby rock bearing the names of a man and a lady who I assumed were tourists who had passed through here earlier. My imagination started to run wild. What if this wasn’t actually a house but just a shelter for people who were climbing up or descending the mountain? In that case, no one would be coming that evening and it was possible that I could be all alone the whole night without water. I had assumed that this was a house but I didn’t believe that Guatemalans or Mexicans would leave so much trash lying about the area. I was certain now that what I was seeing was a clear sign of the presence of foreigners. It was then that I realized that I had to keep moving.

I decided that there was only one way for me to find the right path to take; I would try them all. The first path that I set out on was easy enough to follow in the beginning but suddenly it appeared to stop right at the edge of a cliff that dropped down forever. Way below, I could see houses and fields. I could even hear dogs barking. I had no idea if I was looking down at Guatemala or Mexico. I suppose that this is the last thing I should have been thinking about but I was afraid that I would come down in the wrong country and find myself in a lot of trouble because of my passport. When I looked closer, I discovered that the path I was on did continue but that it was very narrow and one misstep could mean a horrible death. To continue on the path I would have to make a jump and if I slipped, it would be my last jump on this earth. This didn’t make sense to me because I knew that the path I was looking for was one used by tourists. This path was way too dangerous. As I was turning around to climb back up the hill and try another path, a strange event occurred that would haunt me for the rest of the trip. Hundreds of feet or more below me and way off in the distance I could see two people moving on another part of the mountain. From where I was they looked like toy figurines but I instantly tried to communicate with them.
     “Oye! Tengo Pregunta!” I said in Spanish. Hey! I have a question! I could hear my voice echoing down below. A second later I received a response.
“Preguntame!” Ask! I couldn’t believe that I was actually talking with someone who was so far away but I quickly took advantage of this opportunity.
     “Estoy buscando el camino para Trigales. Donde esta?” I am looking for the path to Trigales! Where is it? I could barely see these people but I was able to see hand movement as one of the men below motioned in the direction behind me.
     “Esta mas atras!” he called to me. It is behind you! I opened my mouth to ask another question and then suddenly he and his companion was gone. Just like that. A huge blanket of fog had rolled into the valley and now I was on my own again. Feelings of loneliness and isolation swept over me like a tidal wave but just in case they could still hear me I called out,
     “Gracias!” Thank You! I never received a response. Once again, I climbed back up the hill and found myself standing in front of the house again. This was no ordinary hill that I had been climbing up and down. It was a steep embankment and I was quickly becoming exhausted. Several factors were taking their toll. First, I had no water. The small amount of water that I had carried with me from the cow pastures had long since disappeared. Second, I had not eaten since the night before and third it was raining and I was beginning to feel very cold. I knew that I had to get down the mountain and find shelter. In reality I truly don’t know how bad the situation was up there but I know that in my mind I was very afraid that I would not be able to survive another night so high up without rain protection, food, and water. I suddenly did not care into which country the paths led. If I came down into Guatemala then so be it. I just needed to find a city and a place to get warm. I gave up on finding the right path and just started walking down another path that I had not yet tried. I decided that as long as it didn’t lead me over the edge of a cliff and as long as it continued downhill, I would follow it. As I made my way down the path, I saw a very encouraging sign. There was litter all over the place and when I bent down to look at some of it I discovered that it came from various countries including the US. I realized then that I had tried this path earlier but I had given up on it because it had seemed to end at a fence. This time, however, I took a long look over the fence and I realized excitedly that the “path of litter” continued! I opened a crude door in the fence and started following the path. I also began seeing rocks with graphite splattered all over them. I still had no idea if this path led back to Mexico or Guatemala but I didn’t care. At times, the path seemed to fade away but the garbage was always there so I never completely lost sight of where I was going. Soon, hope filled my heart because I began to hear noise; people noise. I could hear people talking and the sounds of playing children. I also realized, however, that sound travels very fast in the mountains so it was really hard to tell where the sounds were coming from or how far away they were. A little while later, I came upon a house but no one was there. There was also no one at the second house I encountered. Even though this was frustrating, at least I knew I was moving closer and closer to a village or small town.

Meanwhile, my old nemesis “the dark” was working against me. Seemingly every minute, the sun was dipping lower and lower into the horizon and I knew that soon I would just have to drop down and stay the night wherever I was. The thought of spending another night alone on the mountain was not pleasant but already I was falling all over the place because of the wetness and tall weeds. I had been walking for hours without water and once again I began to feel dehydrated. I think I tried to cry once but I couldn’t; there was nothing to cry with. I could tell that I still had a ways to go before I reached the bottom and I knew that my chances of reaching it before dark were slim to none.

Suddenly, as I was walking, I heard a sound. At first I thought it was just a breeze blowing through the trees but when I looked at the branches and leaves I realized that there was no wind. What I was hearing was the beautiful sound of a waterfall falling into a pool somewhere below me on the mountain. Once I heard this welcome noise, I knew that I had to concentrate on finding the source. I was pretty sure by then that I would not make it to a village before dark but if I could find water then it would be much easier for me to survive a night on the mountain. I began walking as fast as I dared even as darkness descended upon the volcano Tacana. For the second time that day, I realized that I was being deceived by a sound on the mountain. What I thought was nearby was actually way down below me and the route that I was taking was steep and treacherous. I tried to find the most conservative way to descend but a few times I had to make risky jumps and once or twice I tripped and started rolling. To any animals or mountain folk who were observing me I must have looked crazy. In fact, I was crazy; I was desperate for water. Then it was dark. It just was. There was nothing that I could do about it. I had to drop down right where I was and try to get comfortable for the night. When I lay down I stretched one of my feet out and I realized that I was lying on a ledge on the side of a small cliff. I grabbed a rock nearby and through it over the ledge. A second later I heard it hit the ground many feet below me. Just great, I thought. Just great. I was lying on a ledge that dropped off to who knows where in the middle of a jungle on the side of a volcano. I was hungry and dehydrated and the temperature was steadily dropping. I was also sunburned on my head and my hair itched. If I rolled over during the night it could be fatal. Not only was I worried about what lay below me but I was also worried about rocks falling from above me and killing me. I also had no idea what kind of animals were running around the area at night. And if that wasn’t enough, somewhere below me I could hear the sound of running water; this was pure torture.

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